Just a pile of thoughts

Hellaaaaaaaaao everyone who's still reading my blog! Hahaha.
I even forgot the last time I wrote about my personal life on this blog :(. Last month I was fully caught up with my 3rd term's final projects and enjoying my 2 weeks break to the fullest in my hometown (read: just stay at home doing almost nothing eeeeveryday) as I just miss my home, my parents, and the smell of my bedroom sooooo much . I truly feel bad for neglecting my blog which is actually supposed to be my 'online diary'.

Tonight I just feel like writing something here instead of working on my assignments.

These days, I realize that I'm the type of person who rely on myself a bit too much. Well, I'm an extrovert. I can share my problems to other people, I open up easily, but after that I'm back to solving the problem I have alone. I hear their advices, but the voices inside me (which most of them are not good) win. It's sooooo hard to fight my own thoughts although I already know which one is right, which one is wrong.

I have many friends, but I only trust a few.
I enjoy hanging out with friends, but sometimes I just want to stay at home.
I enjoy doing many things alone.
I can stay locked up in my room all day long doing my own things.
I go to the gym alone 95% of the time (I am aware that I'm still stuck in this never-ending gym-addiction circle even though I'm kinda underweight............I just can't stand doing too little movements on daily basis. Blame Indonesia for the bad public transportations, sidewalks, and airpollutions.)
I don't feel awkward going to the cinema alone, wandering alone while traveling, etc.
There are just too many things I want to explore, I want to do, I want to tell...
The only people I will never ever mind to be with me are my parents. (Thank you so much mom, dad for bearing with this stubborn daughter of yours.)
One of my mom's 2016 wish was a boyfriend for me (it's already September. Only 3 months left till this wish expires. lol).
It's not that I don't want a boyfriend. I WANT one. But he has to be ready to understand me, to guide me patiently when I'm wrong, and have similar interests with me too. Hahaaha.
Maybe when I have a boyfriend I'll spend less time at the gym. lol.

About things related to school,
term 3's ending was so bad (a.k.a spent so much money on final projects, esp 1 project where the money I spend wasn't worth it) that I don't have the heart to beg my parents to fund me for the school's field trip to Tokyo... (yes, Tokyo. The city that I MISS so much).
The cost for the field trip was beyond my expectation and more expensive than arranging my own trip. Well I can't blame the school tho as the tour includes going to Tokyo Fashion Week, visiting Japanese's textile factories, etc.

Deep inside my heart I was sooooo sad that I couldn't join it. I don't have the heart to spend my own savings on it too haahah. So everyday I look up to airline promotions and finaaaalllyyyy, last Saturday I purchased the TICKET TO JAPAN for next April 2017!! My parents wanna go back to Japan too so they'll join mee! OMG ! OMG! Fyi, I will pay for my own fees this time! Hehe! *motivation to work harder so I can shop more later*
I'm so excited to go to Japan again with my parents next year. Yay for another adventure for the 3 of us!!!